The Moment of Anger

Have you ever just felt a 'rush' of anger?
So much so that you lashed out at someone spitefully,  or do some hurtful things.And then, later you feel the guilt and regret doing it.
FYI, that always happens to me.
Just had a 'shouting' competition with my younger brother.

Made a cup of soya milk for him coz he was hungry.
I poured it into a Doraemon cup, it's not really hiss cup, kinda like for anyone in the family to use.
The next moment he came in, he was crying and shouting that he wanted a red one.
And I thought he wanted a red straw, since he likes using straws to drink.
So I inserted one and yet he continues crying and crying.
Then, I got mad, and started shouting back too.
And the war starts....

Turns out he wanted a green cup, which he always uses when mum made milk for him.
Just that he can't express himself and remembered the colour wrongly.


10 minutes later, I feel bad, for shouting.
Seriously, it's just going as low as an 8 year old for shouting back when he shouts at you.
You know, since I'm 'grown-up' and all, should have just calmed him down and ask him to talk nicely, right?
Instead of shouting and shouting and shouting.
Stupid Michele.

This is just one of a gazilion times where I lose it and anger overtook, only to find out later that what I did was wrong.
Sigh.I'm sorry, Lord.
I'm sorry to all the people out there whom I lashed at just because of something small and silly.
I'm trying to be more patient, so give me the chance.

Dear God

source

Dear God,
I know You are there.
Eventhough I can't and never will see You, I know You are there.
For You are so full of glory, who am I,but a sinner to see Your holy face?

Dear Father,
Please heal our land, my land.Your people.
Your people need You.Need Your love.
Reveal Youself to these people.
That Your face may no longer be hidden from them.
Have mercy on us.
For not knowing the one and only true fact.
That You are the Lord of Lords and King of Kings.
You will triumph and be glorified to the ends of the earth.
Forgive our sins.
Hear our prayer Lord.


Thank You for always being there for us.
Even when we can't feel You.
Even when we are blinded by the thick fog in front of our eyes.
Thank You for being our Lord.
Thank You for being my shelter.
A place I can run to, always, when no one else can comfort me the way You do.
Thank you for loving me and others, even when we don't deserve it.
Thank You for never failing me.

I love you, Lord.

Michele's Tots

I recently found this website www.christianity.com.

And I thank God that this website was found.

It offers so much information and cleared my doubts.

Really, it's a great website.

Both for christians and non-christians who want to know about christianity and the religion.

And I came across this little passage, under the topic: What is a Christian?

Written by I-don't-know-who.Sorry.

But what really touched me was this letter written by a guy named Cody to the writer.

Here;s what it says:

1-11-07

Mr. Pritchard,

My name is Cody. I'm currently in jail in Arizona. The last few years of my life have been very hard for me. I have been lost in addiction to methamphetamines and lost in a life of crime and sin. I recently picked up the Bible and have been trying to find my way to Christ. I'm 19 years old and really want to change my life. I believe the only way I will be successful is through my Savior, the Lord Jesus Christ.

I just (about ten minutes ago) finished reading An Anchor for the Soul. It was a very good book and answered a lot of my questions regarding Christ and how to go about accepting him into my heart. 

Before I picked up the Bible, I always wondered if I was "good enough" to go to heaven. Now I know that I am not. But thanks to God giving his one-and-only Son for my sins, I will go to heaven. I know this now, and I trust Christ will lead me there. I am no longer afraid of death because I know the Father will accept me.

Thank you and God bless!

Sincerely,
Cody

Really really inspiring and thought-provoking.

I nearly cried after reading it.

And I feel happy for that person.

It's like I wana go all over and give a big big hug right now.

I suddenly felt like I wanna go and talk to people like him.;D

People who are lost and hurt.

People who are aimless and tired of the worldly life they live in.

 I feel for these people.

But, I'm gonna commit all these into God's hand.

He's gonna do whatever He finds neccessary.

Right now, I'm gonna just focus on my study.

Sometimes though, I do wonder.

What is the purpose of my reading law??

Is it really to just get a degree, pass the CLP, earn money and grow up??

Then later marry, live a perfectly normal live and die??

Then what is the purpose of life??

I don't want to that.

I want to live my life knowing that I lived well as in I served my purpose on earth.

But what is it??what will I be doing in future??

I don't know.So far He has not reveal anything relevant to me yet.

All I get is short short liltle things.And I forgot all of them already.

The only one I remembered was that when I was in form 4,

this pastor and wife came.And one sentence she told me:

You are goingna be an example to other young people.

Then in form 5, I was the KM.

But I don't think that is the fullfillment of it.

Or rather, I don't wanna just stop there.

I know I'm still not good enough and I wana continue to grow and be much much better than I already am.

Then only I want that statement to come true.When I am good enough to be one.

Because right now, I'm still a work of clay with much dents and bents.

It's not there yet.I'm not gonna say I've been a good exmaple to other young people.

Whatever is it,I'm gonna leave it all to God.

May His will be done.

And here, something that all of you can read.

What is a Christian??

1) It begins with God and his choice of us.
2) It requires the true preaching of the gospel.
3) It leads to a heart-felt acceptance of Christ as Lord and Savior.
4) It results in a changed life that changes other lives.
5) It means that we go "all in" on Jesus. 

It starts with God.
It is based on truth of who Jesus really is.
It changes everything about my life.

It's not enough to be Baptist or Methodist or Lutheran or Catholic.
It's not enough to be American or Chinese or Greek or any other nationality.
It's not enough to be religious.
It's not enough to go to church.

Some interesting facts to consider:

1) The name "Christian" was not invented by early Christians. It was a name given to them by others.
2) Christians called themselves by different names—disciples, believers, brethren, saints, the elect, etc.
3) The term apparently had a negative meaning in the beginning: "those belonging to the Christ party."
4) It was a term of contempt or derision.
5) We can get a flavor for it if we take the word "Christ" and keep that pronunciation. You "Christ-ians." 
6) It literally means "Christ-followers." 
7) Over time a derogatory term became a positive designation. 
8) Occasionally you will hear someone spit the term out in the same way it was used in the beginning. "You Christians think you're the only ones going to heaven."
9) There was a sense of suffering and reproach attached to the word in the New Testament.

Adapted from here.

Michele's Tots

Before I start, something for you to laugh about.If you follow these instuctions:

‎1. Go to google
2. Search for "top 50 women on the internet"
3. Select the 1st link
4. Look at Number 7
5. Laugh hard!!!

So I had a lotta thoughts lately.

Namely about my choice of future.

You know, when I applied for all the government scholarships last 2 month?

And I was hoping and hoping but didnt get???

And I was so frustrated then.

It's like I could just lash out and scold God if God was there, as in human form.

Then I reapplied, but till now, no news yet.

So I guess I'll be in Brickfields forever.

I mean till I graduate.

But I found out something else,

that what I want may not be what God has in mind.

And I think, I believe that BAC is THE place for me.

lol. I don't know how to explain.

I don't enjoy dao like really heaven style.

But it wasn't realy that stressful.

Eventho I had to take public transport to n fro, 

eventho the place is famous for it's 'acid-attacks ',

but up till now I've been quite safe.

And I had enough time to get closer to God,

time to study and play, 

to online n watch Korean dramas,

to exercise n swim.

Yeah, I realized all that as of today.

And I found answers while reading Luke today.

My moral teacher was asking, since Jesus was born in New testament, does that mean He isn't present in Old testament?How could a God be born just like that?

And she resorted to saying, In Islam, bla blabla..

And I asked around but only found satisfying answers today.

In Luke 20:42,(David's psalm)

The LORD(God)said to my Lord(Jesus).

Jesus was there when David was alive, which means Jesus was there all the while.

Sorry nonbelievers, guess you wouldn't understand what I mean.

But it's just something I acknowledge.

And it's kinda for Breena too.Hehe..

It's not correcting you, Breena, it's sharing. LOL

I got a better understanding of the concept of afterlife too.

Which is part of my moral project also.

In Luke 20: 34-38.

Heaven would be so different from earth.

a)Marriage does not occur there.

b)We will not die anymore.

c)we will be similar to angels and are sons of God.

I feel so great.Getting all the answers needed.

Cheers!!!=)

Days after SPM

is just so boring!!
Esp if you dont work and don't play and you're just sitting around waiting for time to pass or waiting to hear answers from the government on whether they accept you into their uni or not.
And you wana work but don't get the chance to do some work that pays good money.
And by good money I meant not those high payment professional jobs but good money as in reasonable amount to get myself whatever I wanted.
Argh.
As I browse through the shops I find myself geting greedier and unsatisfied.
Like I wana own everything that I ever wanted.
That's why I created that list of things that I'm gonna buy once I get my first pay of say, RM 2500.
That would be great, don't you think??
ANd mind you, it's not a birthday wishlist.I don't do that.
And thou shalt not get anything for me from there.
Anyway, got myself a new exercise regime, or something new to rave about.
Which is swimming!!
woots!!The feeling of being able to swim, is so great!!
Got myself goggles, but it rained today.=(
And I miss all the fun in school or talking nonsense with She-Reen and Breena,
Of talking low waist jeans with Chai Yin and Kar Mern and Shu Qiong,
Of laughing our asses off on school dramas between the ahem and ahem.
On gossiping and talking things that just happens to be fun and creative,
Of the headaches and problems I faced in school as the KM,
Of getting angry at something or somebody and just blurting it out to my Ears-es(it meant two person)
Of talking and laughing out loud beside the Rohini gang,
Of disccusing stuffs which later turns out to be a quarrel with my buddies,
Of argue-ing back at Kritz and thinking that I'll never win him,
Of 'huh-ing' at Tiong Hsien as he uses his base voice to talk,
And of rolling my eyes at The Rohini's famous laugh..........
Oh, the lists goes on!
Yeah, I miss those times.And I guess you do too.
But that's just a part of life which everyone goes thru I guess.
And now, it's time to move forward.Embrace the future and keep those sweet memories in mind.
LOL.I think I sound like some pro-wise woman.LOL

Japan =(

For those of you who doesn't even know what's happening around you, here's a short post on the disaster that hit Japan.

Japan's most powerful earthquake since records began has struck the north-east coast, triggering a massive tsunami.

Cars, ships and buildings were swept away by a wall of water after the 8.9-magnitude tremor, which struck about 400km (250 miles) north-east of Tokyo.

A state of emergency has been declared at a nuclear power plant, where pressure has exceeded normal levels.

Officials say 350 people are dead and about 500 missing, but it is feared the final death toll will be much higher.

In one ward alone in Sendai, a port city in Miyagi prefecture, 200 to 300 bodies were found.

The quake was the fifth-largest in the world since 1900 and nearly 8,000 times stronger than the one which devastated Christchurch, New Zealand, last month, said scientists.

Thousands of people living near the Fukushima nuclear power plant have been ordered to evacuate.

Japanese nuclear officials said pressure inside a boiling water reactor at the plant was running much higher than normal after the cooling system failed.

Officials said they might need to deliberately release some radioactive steam to relieve pressure, but that there would be no health risk.

US Secretary of State Hillary Clinton had earlier said the US Air Force had flown emergency coolant to the site.

source


SOMA, Japan - The second hydrogen explosion in three days rocked Japan's stricken Fukushima Dai-ichi nuclear plant today, sending a massive column of smoke into the air and wounding 6 workers. The plant's operator said radiation levels at the reactor were still within legal limits.

The explosion at the plant's Unit 3, which authorities have been frantically trying to cool following a system failure in the wake of a massive earthquake and tsunami, triggered an order for hundreds of people to stay indoors, said Chief Cabinet Secretary Yukio Edano.

Tokyo Electric Power Co. said radiation levels at Unit 3 were 10.65 microsieverts, significantly under the 500 microsieverts at which a nuclear operator must file a report to the government.

The blast follows a similar explosion Saturday that took place at the plant's Unit 1, which injured four workers and caused mass-evacuations.

Japan's nuclear safety agency said 6 workers were injured in Monday's explosion but it was not immediately clear how, or whether they were exposed to radiation.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

And I keep getting these messages on facebook n sms,
which serves as a precaution to you readers too,


There was a nuclear blast 4.30p.m, Sunday in Fukushima, Japan. If it rains today or later,or even next few days, DO NOT GO UNDER THE RAIN, even if it’s only a drizzle. Its acid rain!!!! U may burn ur skin, loss ur hair or hav cancer~!!!!!


BBC NEWS: Japan Government confirms radiation leak at fukishima nuclear plants. Asian countries should take necessary precautions. Remain indoors first 24 hours. Close doors and windows. Swab neck skin with betadine where thyroid area is, radiation hits thyroid first. Radiation may hit Philippines starting 4:00pm TODAY. ( PLEASE REPOST )


There was a nuclear blast 4:30pm Sunday in Fukushima Japan. If it rains today or in the next few days, DO NOT GO UNDER THE RAIN. If you get caughtout, use an umbrella or raincoat, even if it's only a drizzle. Radioactive particles, which may cause burns, alopecia or even cancer, may be in the rain.Pls pass.


SO,
please pray for Japan.
That the people may find refuge in HIM at this time.
That the LORD will have mercy on us, all of us.
You never know, when the next disaster will hit us.
Don't laugh or scorn at them.
This might just serve as a warning to us out here.=((((

Thoughts

Case 1:
I'm ending my love story at Old Town soon.
Kiss goodbye to boyfriend.(So don't worry Daphne)
Well,It's saddenfying.
Another bye-bye's.Then again, life's full of them eh?meeting n seperating.
Eventho I might not need to meet 'monkey woman' ever again, but still there are some good people there who is really worth remembering.
I remembered Josh mentioning to me that my job is great to take revenge at people like' monkey woman' here.
You know, I could just take a plate full of chili soup (ahh...spicy spicy) and 'accidently' pour it on their head.And shout out as happy as possible: Ooooops,sorry!!!!!
Great idea!But too bad, I didn't have the heart to do that.
I just can't drench anyone I like.
Oh, but I learned a lot .I know every juicy secrets that Old Town holds.
Ask me what's nice n what's not nice, n I'll tell you.XP
I think I might post a photo here of the very last day of me in that place.



Case 2:
A very dear uncle, who is a member of the church, went to heaven last Sat.
Shocking.He was well when I last met him, like one n half month ago.
And suddenly he's not there anymore.
That just shows how short n precious life is.
I went out, upfront to give a tribute with my friends.
A first time in somebody's funeral.*I think I sucked at it*
But anyway, it's over.
Hope he's happy being with the LORD.


Case 3:
SPm results will be out soon.
I'm scared.
You know, the pressure on me to get a perfect score is so huge.
Don't worry I'm not gonna kill myself if the results came out wrong.
I love my life too much for that.
And I still don't know what to study.
Most probably law.
At where?still dunno.
haha.I thought of doing a double degree.Medic n Law.
And someone said: 'Michele, you siao ah?'
HAHAHA.
okay, I think that it's not possible too.
So I still dunno.I do really wish I could just take both.(which I know never happens)


Case 4:
Seriously I don't understand why did they act like that?
You know, eventho we quareled n disagree on stuffs.
But it's over now.
That is like a grandmother's story already.
In my opinion, we should part happily.Blessing each other's future.
Instead of destroying it.
Let the sweet memory stay where it should be.
How could you 'force' people to wash it away?
Honestly, admit it to youself,eventho the last few months have been bitter, but still we did have good memories together.
Why don't you let it be, instead of trying to forgetting that these things never happened?
Instead of treating it like some bitter n hurtful history??
Because I know it's not.
Right now, it's over.
We disagree n we seperate.
The end of story.
Is it so difficult?
Why is it after that you just have to make it even more painful??
That you just had to do the the follow-ups??
That you just had to part like enemy?
Why can't you make life easier.Seriously, walking past me as tho I'm transparent.Because I know eventho I'm thin n stick n all, people who have eyes can still see me.
True??
Oh whatever, because whatever's done is done.
I'm just blurting out my frustrations here.



Case 5:
I went to a taekwondo lesson last Sun.
At some Selayang primary school.I mean not as the peserta, but as the ahem...personal secretary of the taekwando master.
I still laugh everytime I think about my post.Newly invented on that day.
And the kiddies are so cute.
There was a fat(ahem..plump)boy, before doing a half bridge, blurted out : Alhamdullilah.
I find it so funny.
For those of you who don't know what is a bridge(a gymnastic term):

Don't worry he never did break his backbone.

The best part of that day is, I learned a lot.Life lessons n such.

From my driver, who drove me there.;D

And haha..I finally know what is roti bakar.Stupid me, it's actually just an ordinary bread toast.

PS: New discovery.I'm never going to get a lawyer boyfriend.

Case 6:

I'm going to get my 'L' license.YAY!!!!!!!

I finished the kononya 6 hours course.

Why i say kononya?because the name is ^ hours, actually I learned nothing.Zero.The penceramah talked crap, alot.

And am currently waiting for my 'L' cert to come out.

Fiona, Isaac, Dap, Maple n I went to old town tmn kinrara after that to grab a bite.

And guess what, I finally know what is a slurpee.

Which Fiona n I bought from a nearby 7-eleven.

Here are some pictas:(credits to Fiona)

Lookee at my beautiful green tongue, after effect of drinking the Slurpee.Oh, I changed my specs, did you notice?

I like this photo of us, so sweet!

Of us girls, Isaac as photographer.

Okay, the end of this blogpost.I don't think I will update soon enough.

As my comp is currently down, AGAIN.

And as I type this, I'm using a lousy old comp which runs superr slowly.Wasting my time.pfffft.

Bye~

Year 2010 part 1

Before I start, the intonation for these blog posts are melancholic. 

Yes, because this whole year carries a lot of sweet memories.

To be more accurate, this year gathered many memories from the past few years, but it all ends in year 2010.

The photos here shows PART of the people that I won't be meeting next year.

There are a whole lot bunch of people that I'll miss so much.

Yes, separation is indeed sad.

Anyway, this post is about school.

okay I'll talk along with the photos.

this is of me n bree
Breena, I've known breena since form 1.
An euro-asian.And pretty curls for her hair!
And we've stuck to each other ever since then.=)
She was the 1st christian I know in school.
Over the years, we've got a lot more closer n we hang out with each other,
EVERY SCHOOL DAY.

this is she-reen.Or rather, shreen.
I don't know why, but photos always come out looking pretty when both of us are in it.
Some hidden power she's got.LOL
No offense people, everyone of you are pretty.
It's just that I feel we both look exceptionally amazing together,in photos.
Right, shreen??
Yes, she's in my trio gang, with breena.*winks*

Two more photos of us:

LOOK AT HIS SHIRT!!!!He's gonna need lotsa dynamo man!
Daniel.LOL.I remember the way he pronounce my name: my-ke-lee.
Yes, I know he sengaja one.And tease me always on my conducting.( choral speaking)

From left: Jia Yu, Shu qiong, Cui ting. 

ok.the rose among thorns.
From left: Wai Lun, Tilak, Kritz, Eirban, Tiong Hsien.
Wai Lun, as me ketua kelas.
Tilak, the thing I remember most about him is his hair!!!!!!LOL
Kritz, aiyah..I'll still see him one lah.
Eirban: mamak!!!!seriously, open a Mamak stall when you grow up!I shall visit!=D
thanks for sharing the andrewchoo tips with me.
Altho it is not accurate, but still thanks for your generousity!
tiong hsien: I shall miss the time when we huh-ed each other out,get frustrated n at the same time being laughed at .
its not my prob okay, his voice so deep every word has the same frequency.LOL

Athirah!!!!!she has a beau smile n white teeth!!!!LOL
And I love her biscuits n kuih raya!

Nisa, I shall miss the time we perasan each other out!

LMBO!shreen says we look like bgf in this pic, but in realife, it's not ok.
He is just a freind, with fair skin n colgate teeth.LOL 

HAHA!!!!these two has a talent in laughing!!!

My best friend among prefects!>>>>>these two:

My partner-in-crime.Also an amazing photographer.

Div!!!!She's soo pretty now!
And I love her for having so many funny jokes, making us laugh till stomachache!

Karmern, LOL.My pretty toilet partner!!!!I shall miss the times when we go toilet together.
EVERY MORNING!

Cui Ting, who calls me her jie eventho her birthdate is earlier than mine!

My two splendid Guru Pengawas!!

Thanks to angeline, this is like the nicest photo we've ever took together.

PS: more photos will be uploaded to FB!
PSS: the photos are in random arrangement, not from 'most imp to not so imp people'.Don't get jealous!! =p

FaCe people!!!!!

I stumbled across this on yahoo, sharing it here;D



Ah, the basics of skin care. Wash, rinse, and repeat later—right? Not so fast...here are five common habits that will end up ruining your skin. (Read the Other Four Here)

1. Choosing the Wrong Cleanser
Jennifer Fifer, owner of Tru Skin Clinical Spa in Manhattan, says women often buy high-end exfoliating products and moisturizers, but don't pay attention to what’s actually in them. Choose products with few chemicals, she advises. Avoid those containing SD-40, isopropyl alcohol, a common ingredient that can be an irritant for acne-prone and sensitive skin types, leading to redness, dryness, and in some cases, brown spots and premature aging. Related: What the Heck Causes Adult Acne?

2. Over-Exfoliating
Many products today have alpha hydroxy acids to combat wrinkles and fine lines, but if you mix-and-match too often — for example, an acid-based moisturizer in the morning and an exfoliating cream at night — you run the risk of inflaming your skin. Related: The Top 5 Body Scrubs

3. Moisturizing Too Much
Surprisingly, women with dry skin should avoid over-moisturizing, so don't spackle on cream or heavy moisturizers. "It causes more congestion in the long run," says Fifer. "Women would do better to invest in a good humidifier instead, especially if they live in a dry climate." Related: More Tips for Dry Skin

4. Not Washing Your Face Before You Go to Bed
You fall asleep with your makeup on, what's the big deal? "Never, never, never!" says Fifer. Even if it's only a rare occurrence, the problems can cascade into your complexion for a week. To avoid a skin-care nightmare, be sure to wash your face before you head to bed.

5. Wearing Old Makeup
When was the last time you threw out your makeup? Don't hang on to beauty products if you don't use them frequently. Since your fingers are usually your applicator, bacteria build up fast in bottles and in makeup sponges, then end up on your face. As a rule of thumb, Fifer suggestions tossing foundation out after six months.


(adapted from http://shine.yahoo.com/channel/beauty/5-bad-skin-habits-that-you-need-to-quit-2409892/)